She’s A Lady!


I AM NO LONGER THE DANCING QUEEN! 😢

It was my eighteenth birthday yesterday. A day I wasn’t really looking forward to.

 

My helium balloon!

First of all, I had four tests (in the week) to prepare for, which is also the reason I’ve been MIA, and the stress of it all, although I don’t show it, was getting to me. However, that being said, I had the best day! Since it was a school day, I got a lot of ‘Happy Birthday’s and messages and birthday snapchat stories because that’s how our generation show love. And my friends made it such a great day.

 

But, as I promised from a previous post, I’m going to explain why I didn’t want to turn eighteen.

DISCLAIMER: I’m not saying any of the following is relatable and about all adults, I just felt like me, being eighteen, means I’m more prone to these things.

 

First of all, being an adult tends to be associated with maturity and responsibility. I, on the other hand, am a very weird, energetic person in real life. I do weird crazy things. Being an adult means I can no longer blame that behaviour on the fact I am a child. This is sad news. I still have the face of a twelve year old, though, so I might pass as a child.

 

Making friends is easier when you’re a child because you’re in school practically everyday. I still have another year in school but still! I have university either next year or the year after and although there will be people there to talk to, I feel like it might be harder to make friends. I am a social person and will take initiative in situations like that but it’s still daunting.

 

I used to get stuff for free. NOW I HAVE TO PAY. For example, I have to pay for eye care, dental care and probably a bunch of other stuff I don’t know about. That’s actually a little bit of a lie because I still get eye and dental care for free since I’m in full time education but my point is, being eighteen means I have to pay for stuff. My parents are making me pay for my phone bill. ☹ I do like to be in control, though, so maybe it’s a good thing.

 

I hate the idea of being grown up. I don’t want to grow up. This ties in with the acting weird point because I don’t want to be completely mature and ‘normal’. I also don’t want to worry constantly and get so involved in money issues.

 

I have to make big decisions and there’s not much leeway for my indecisive ways, right now. I can’t just change my mind tomorrow and decide I want to be an astronaut, like you can do when you’re a child. I know that it’s never too late to do what you want (unless you’re on the brink of death, then I’m so sorry) but the way society works and the school system works, I feel pressured to make sure my whole life plan starts now and isn’t a failure.

 

I can go to prison for a criminal offence. This one’s going to be really difficult for me. 😬

Despite all of the negativity that’s been most of this post (sorry), I wanted to add a little bit of positivity because on the majority of occasions, I try my hardest to look on the bright side of things. 😄

  • I can finally vote, which is important to me because I like to make my own decisions and have my say on things.
  • I can serve jury duty, which is always fun, amirite?!
  • I can get a tattoo. I actually want to get one of a semi colon!
  • Ya girl gets paid more! A whole two pounds more. 💸
  • I can make a will, which, again, is always fun!
  • I can buy fireworks.

The vegan Baileys ft. Willow, my cat

I can do a lot more important things but those are my top six.

 

 

Also, big announcement! I had my first legal alcoholic drink. It was dairy free almond milk Baileys. Dairy free because one of my best friends, who gave it to me, is vegan and is clearly respectful to the acne prone antichrist that is my skin. She also made me a vegan cake.

 

To end on a high note, eighteen isn’t that bad. AgE iS JuSt a NuMBeR…

 

-Shay

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Rants of Retail!

I have a part time job in a clothes shop, where my role changes throughout the day. This means I get to experience different aspects and areas of working in retail and although I am extremely grateful for having a job, especially since it’s not a hard job, there are still downfalls.

So today, I’m going to be ranting about those downfalls. 😀

 

The Customer Isn’t Always Right

Customer service is a huge part of working in retail and I’m generally a nice person, so I am nice to the customers and try to help as much as possible. But good lord, give me strength, sometimes there are people that I honestly think and choose to think have come from living in a cave, having been raised by wolves. It’s like they have no respect or care for other people. I completely understand you can be in a bad mood but it’s still wrong to be mean to someone, especially a worker trying to help you out.

I’ve gotten subtle racism, rude remarks about how I’m doing things wrong when I’m really not, ageism, harassment from older men, etc.  It can really mess up your day when you experience it.

 

The 5p Bane of the Universe Bag

In the UK, the charge for a plastic carrier bag is 5p. This is because it promotes and encourages people to not buy plastic bags and re-use their own or get a bag for life. It means that there will be less plastic bags littered on the streets and less plastic will be manufactured and broken down, adding to global warming. And I mean, it’s only 5p. You can find that on the walk to the shop.

However, if I got 5p for the amount of times I’ve been asked why they need to pay for it or have to stand behind the till, listening to customers complain about the charge, I wouldn’t even need a job. It gets old.

If you don’t want to get rid of your change, re-use a plastic bag or use the magic and power of your hands.

And then I have those cases where people will buy the tiniest thing like a keyring and ask for a bag. Seriously? XD Defeats the whole purpose of save the environment.

 

The Jokes

Sometimes, there isn’t a price tag on the clothes that someone is buying. This means I have to type in a code and usually, before I type it in, I tell them there’s no price tag so they know why I’m going to be tapping away at the keyboard. And sometimes, there are people who like to make overused jokes. I love conversing with customers but just skip the annoying jokes like the ever so funny, “Oh so I guess it’s free then haha.” This also happens when the barcode isn’t working.

I didn’t know I was serving Kevin Hart.

 

Waste of Timers

I often get customers come up to the till with a pile of clothes and I’ll start scanning them. Then they’ll ask what size the item they got is and say “oh…that might be too big.” And then they’ll decide they don’t want it. And that’s fine, you can change your mind but don’t. do. it. for. every. single. item.

And sometimes items are misplaced in the wrong sections. Some stands have signs on it saying £8. It actually says from £8, which means £8 and up. But nobody ever reads the ‘from’ bit so they’ll come up, thinking what they’ve got is whatever it said on the sign and not on the actual price tag and then get irritated at me when it’s a price higher.

Along the lines of wrong prices, sometimes people come up to the till, get me to scan and de-tag and bag everything and then realise the price is a whole £2 above what they thought the price was and yell at me. XD

READ THE PRICE TAG OR ASK FIRST!!!

 

Also, don’t come and tell me that a certain item you have your eye on is cheaper in another shop. If it’s cheaper in another shop, go there then.

 

Are You Gonna Pick That Up?

But seriously, are you?

The amount of times I’ve tidied something up and someone goes over to that particular stand and dropped a few things, turned the hangers around, managed to turn the clothes inside out and have the audacity to look me in the eye and do nothing is beyond me. Or let their kids run around knocking things to the floor.

I get that it’s my job and I have to clean it up but it’s not hard to just hang the one thing your just dropped. It’s like littering and saying it’s the street cleaner’s job to pick it up.

 

The Cherry On Top

Get ready for this because these are true stories. I have never been there on the days these have happened but I get told about it very quickly.

 

One piece of advice for you when clothes shopping is don’t get to comfy in the changing rooms.

People have pooped in there. For real.

 

This one man kept asking for the toilet and asked what he was gonna do since there isn’t a toilet. So he went in the changing room and I don’t think I need to explain anymore.

This other boy was trying on these suits. He was in the changing room for ages and my manager asked his brother why he was taking so long. Eventually, the boy came out, with poop in the suit trousers. He pooped in the suit trousers!!! I actually did come that day but not to work, just to shop.

There have been other cases and some with urine too. You’ve got to mix it up every now an again, of course.

 

Despite all these downfalls, I love my job and the people I work with and even the customers, because most of them are nice. I am very grateful for having it and the downfalls can be annoying but to be honest, they don’t actually bother me a lot. There are definitely more pros to cons but I thought the cons would be funny to rant about. I may post a pros post later on.

 

Do any of you have a job or have experienced the same things I have?

 

-Shay

Meet Willow!

For a few days, me and my sister have been searching through ads online for kittens. It wasn’t that we knew, for sure, we were going to get one, we just wanted to look and raise our hopes of getting one. We ended up dragging my dad into the searching and he soon became intrigued. My mum refused to get involved, worried about the sofas and curtains and amount of money we would spend.

 

Willow in the Car

However, and I think you expected this, we saw an ad on Gumtree and we messaged the owner. Three hours later, we were on our drive to their house.

In the three hours before getting her, we contemplated between the names, Penny and Willow. I even sent a vote to my snapchat streaks, friends and cousins, because I couldn’t decide. The winner was Willow, which suited her more anyway.

She meowed in her carrier box on the journey back and let me tell you, this kitten has a loud meow. I had to take her out and hold her for the rest of the journey, as she stared out the window, to stop her meowing.

 

Willow’s a very shy and skittish cat but she’s also very hyper and clumsy. And obviously, she’s adorable!

Although she’s quite hyper, she’s very different to my old cat, Milly, who was quite confident, brave, friendly and crazy. I think her personality will develop more over time, though.

 

Sleeping Under the Chair

She loves sleeping under this chair, which can move out into this bed sort of thing when you press a button, so it’s kind of annoying because now we can’t use the button in case we squish her.

She also won’t do her business in the litter box, if we watch her. I think she gets embarrassed and she goes when we’re not around or she’ll pretend to do something else near by it until we leave.

 

I haven’t had a cat since 2012 so I cannot wait to experience all the ‘cat’ things like waking up to her taking up most of my bed space and the dead mice in our living room.

 

I hope you love Willow as much as I do! I might make more updates on her as time goes along!

 

-Shay

More Crazy Things I Believed as a Child!

I previously made a post about the crazy, absurd things I believed when I was younger and since a lot of people enjoyed reading about how abnormal my head worked, I thought I’d make a part two!

 

How Babies Are Made

I used to think that if two people kiss for a long amount of time, there would be a high chance the female in the couple would become pregnant. I would always wonder when watching films, where people kissed, why they weren’t worried that they would make a baby. I was also scared to ever kiss anyone. I never got the birds and the bees talk. I ended up realising kissing didn’t cause a sperm to fertilise an egg, in year five sex ed lessons.

 

Car Lights

I think this is a common one but I used to think, because of my mum, that it was illegal to turn on the lights inside the car. Surprise, it isn’t! I’m not gonna lie, though, I used to flick it on and off just to scare my mum since I thought it was against the law. I was an edgy kid. 🤙🏽

 

Jeepers Creepers

One of the first horror films I ever watched was Jeeper Creepers. I watched it when I was about four to five. I have great parents. It didn’t traumatise me as much as you might think. I’m okay. I only go to therapy once a month now. 🙂

My guy, Jeeper Creepers

However, for a long long time, I was convinced one day Jeepers Creepers, this scarecrow moth demon thing, was going to get me and at one point, I had accepted it. I accepted my fate. Also, now I hate corn fields. Don’t watch the film, it’s actually really stupid.

I think I finally stopped being scared and watching my back constantly when going into dark areas at around eight. Again, it didn’t traumatise me as much as you might think.

 

Ants and Spiders

My mum once told me that if you left food out, ants and spiders and bugs would come along and surround the area. This is technically true but my little mind interpreted it wrong. I thought she meant by leaving food out, it would cause spiders and ants to just spawn in that exact spot.

One day, in reception, we were all sitting down after break or lunch. Someone had left some sort of food out on the floor and I whispered to the girl next to me about what my mum had said. The rest of that day, I was staring at the floor, waiting in fear for the ants and spiders to erupt from the ground. They never did. But who really knows…

 

Holding Your Breath

I thought that holding your breath would stop your lungs and heart working for a short time. So, I assumed when I held my breath, my pulse would stop too. I never checked the theory and went along with it as if it was legit factual information. It was also one of those things you never think about properly so for a long time, I just believed that holding your breath would also hold your heartbeat.

 

Spiderman Theme Tune

I never properly knew the Spiderman theme tune. There must have been a point where I did know it considering he’s always been my favourite Marvel superhero since I was about five or six (I used to pretend he followed me around and that he was my boyfriend –  don’t judge). Over the years, I have always sung the theme tune differently and for a while, this is the one I’ve stuck to:

Spiderman, Spiderman

Does whatever a Spiderman does

Is he too cool for school?

No he’s not cause he’s an alpaca

Watch out, Spidey’s coming for you!

 

It seems abooout right…

 

Babybel

Babybel is this brand of snack cheese. It’s basically circular cheese encased in this red waxy rubber covering. And everyone brought them in their pack lunches in primary school. So one day, when me and mum went food shopping, I begged her to get babybel cheese because I wanted to bring it to school to basically fit in. Screw being unique! That’s not how you make friends in primary school! My mum told me that I wouldn’t like  it and then she went on to say that it was disgusting and it really put me off it. I would see loads of my friends eating it and I would just sit there thinking, Shay, it’s gross and it doesn’t even look like real cheese. It’s not your loss for not having it, it’s really a gain. I talk to myself a lot

That’s the reason I’ve never even licked one of the babybel cheese snacks. I still continue to think its gross. Maybe I’ll put it on my bucket list to eat one, along with participating in an orgy. I’m just kidding! 😂 I would never eat babybel cheese.

 

Those are some more stupid things my dumb head believed when I was little (and maybe when I got older too… 😅)

Please share any silly things you believed! It’ll help my self esteem. 😊

 

-Shay

Crazy Things I Believed as a Child!

There are a lot of silly and weird things I believed when I was little. I complied a list of a few I could remember and I thought they were too funny to not share.

 

Quick Notice: Before reading this post, make sure to check the Member Search in our online magazine, The Artistics, a group blog/magazine, administered by Jerrod, where we share our creativity. We’re looking for more members so check it out!

 

FedEx Vans

I used to see FedEx vans everywhere, when I was younger, but I didn’t know what they were used for. There was one right outside my house that stayed there for ages. It had been there for years. Inevitably, my little imagination assumed they were spies and were watching people. I mean, who really knows…

 

Growing A Plant

I used to watch Strawberry Shortcake. In this particular episode I saw, she was explaining what you needed, to grow a plant, in three steps. Number one was sunlight. Number two was water. And because it was frEaKIng Strawberry Shortcake, she suggested for number three that you needed love. SO, I was in year three/four, I think, and we were learning about plants. The teacher asked our entire class to raise our hands if we knew what you needed to make a plant grow. Two people had already said the sun and water and nobody else knew anymore so I thought, Hahaha these ignorant fools. I put my hand up and with extreme confidence, announced you needed love to make a plant grow. Spoiler alert, that’s actually wrong and I’m suing Strawberry Shortcake for my emotional damage. Don’t trust that hoe.

I’ve found kids TV shows say a lot of weird things, for example, I once overheard a care bear say “I feel as tired as a nipple after feeding time”.

 

Sleeping Beauty’s Birthday

I got this personalised Disney Princesses story book for my birthday, which is the 16th of October, where I was a character in three different stories (Cinderella, The Little Mermaid and Sleeping Beauty). You’ve probably already heard of something like this but it’s a company that puts the child’s name in the book to make it seem like they’re going on the adventure with whatever the main book characters of the story are. At the beginning of the story, it states it’s the 16th of October and that it’s Briar Rose’s (Sleeping Beauty) and my birthday. So for years and years, after getting that book, I thought Sleeping Beauty had the same birthday as me and I’m not gonna lie, I think it was only last year, at my big age of sixteen, that I realised that the story was personalised for me and every child, who gets that story, will have the same birthday as Sleeping Beauty and it wouldn’t be the 16th of October. You don’t know how many people I’ve told that I have the same birthday as her.

 

The Wind

My mum, for some unknown reason, told me if I made a weird or rude face and the wind changed direction, my facial expression would stay the same forever. I used to be terrified that I would accidentally make the wrong face when I was playing outside while windy.

 

The Land of Orange Juice

When I was in reception or year 1 (about ages 5-6), my best friend came to my house for the day. We were eating lunch and my mum left the room. My friend split her orange juice on the table and I said “Uh oh.” I don’t know why I did this but I started telling her the butterfly effect of what she had done. I said that the orange juice would slowly spread across the whole table and then to us, which would make us stay stuck in the same position forever, and then it would cover the floors and then the house and then the garden, and our parents and eventually, the entire world and then everybody on it and then the Universe and we would all be stuck forever. She cried.

 

Were there any crazy things you believed when you were younger or even recently? I’d love to hear them! 😄

 

-Shay

Say “No” to “No”s.

At a young age, we respond to the question, ‘what do you wanna be or do when you get older?’ with confidence and enthusasim, an attitude like you can conquer the world and anything contained within in.

And then when you do get older, you’re told no. No, you can’t get be a politician. No, you’re not good enough to play football. No, boys can’t be ballerinas. No, you just can’t. We’re told no.

Sometimes, those “No”s come from yourself. I always told myself that I couldn’t work in science because I wasn’t smart enough and it wasn’t  a low self esteem kind of thing, I just accepted and believed that was a border I couldn’t go past.

 

I’ve seen this advert by Samsung, several times, which inspired me to write this post. It’s really inspiring and it’s about people being told what they can’t and shouldn’t do, etc. It’s a great advert but I still refuse to ever get a Samsung phone.

 

I was told that I couldn’t get higher than a grade 4 in maths GCSE, by my teachers. I was at a level 3 at the time and instead of conforming to their No’s, I said yes. And I ended up going up three grades to a level 6 (equivalent to a B).

My psychology teacher  told me I could probably get a D/C and should be ‘realistic’ with my goals for my grades. I got an A.

 

And here’s the little cherry on top with whipped cream.

I requested my teacher to mark my chemistry mock paper in front of me, believing I’d be strong and brave enough to pull through and also thinking her judgmental and harsh criticism about my mistakes would scar me enough to force me not to make the same mistakes again. Pretty good logic, right?

As I stood beside her, awkwardly, while my two friends sat a few meters away at a lab table, she began flicking through the pages, shaking her head and scribbling down with her red pen. She kept writing little comments like “really?” next to my answers and scattered a ton of question marks everywhere. Everywhere.

I just stood there, using all my strength to restrain the freaking river about to pour out my eyeballs, popping with veins. I mean, I didn’t even know what was going on when I was doing the test, how am I supposed to suddenly realise what my thought processes were and answer those goddamn red question marks.

This younger boy (I think year 9/10) came in at one point and asked my teacher what he got in his test and she started discussing with him his grade. I zoned out at this point but I remember the end of their conversation where he pursed his lips and asked “so I got the highest in the class.” My teacher puckered her lips and said “yes.” They locked eyes and I’m pretty sure they were having a moment. I just looked back and forth at both of them.

I swear to god if that boy had longer hair, he would have strutted away whipping it to the side. I could have gagged.

Anyways, at the end of her marking, she looked at me and said, “Shay (well, my full first name), most students are bad at a few topics and good at others.” She paused. “You’re bad at everything.”

I was speechless. How the hell am I supposed to respond to that. 😂

 

In a one to one in the sun, the next day, she explained to me that “I need to stop going out.” Stop going out? What is out?

She even drew out a graph for me, on the front of my paper, comparing my over-achieving-goody-goody-A-student progress in. year. SEVEN to my progress now, in year TWELVE. I don’t think it takes rocket science to figure out that A levels are just a tad, just a smidge, JUST A TEEENY WEEENY bit harder than year seven. You have to remember words like squamous epithelium and nucleophile. She even told me I was going to pass chemistry but I was going to be disappointed.

At the end of marking my paper, I asked her what my grade was. She thought for a while, flicking through the paper, “not a good grade.”

Cool, I thought, “but what grade?”

“An E, maybe a D.”

I found out that my grade was actually a high C, which is actually really not bad at A levels. I mean, I wouldn’t want a final C for my AS grade but the way she made my mock grade out to be made it seem like I’d have to resort to working in the world’s oldest profession…if you know what I mean.

 

Those are small examples about school and grades and I know most people reading will be doing exams and are currently at school (whether that be high school, University, etc) so I feel like those experiences may be relatable to you and also motivating. You may feel limited and people may tell you that you are limited but that isn’t necessarily true and I hope my experiences can prove that to you. I’m not the highest achieving student at school. I’d say I’m about average, nothing extraordinary, but I could still get to where I wanted to be so trust me, you can too.

 

Other examples, besides school experiences, include times where I have been asked to be quiet because I’m “too opinionated”. I’ve been told, indirectly, that I can’t be funny because I’m a girl. I’ve been told I’m small and weak. I’ve been told a lot of things and a lot of “can’t”s and “no”s.

 

Use those “No”s as a way to motivate yourself, prove them wrong because trust me, it feels so good! It’s kind of like revenge but more morally right?  😂 And it feels really good to do things people say you can’t do. Even if that person is yourself.

It takes hard work to prove people wrong but in the long-term it’ll be worth it. It’s a few months of work and a little bit of pain and a hell of a lot of stress for achieving the things you want. And it’s true, some people have to work harder than others. People in developing countries have to work very hard to even get the chance to be at a point of achieving the ability to go on to do secondary education. We get that for free. In fact, we have to go through with it.

 

Whether it be a marathon you’ve been told you can’t do, a test you’ve been told you can’t pass, whether it’s a condition you’ve been told you won’t be able to cope or manage or get past, do what they say you can’t do.

Work and push hard, prove people wrong and make yourself happy. Sometimes it’s not even about doing things to change the now, it’s about proving to people you can deal with whatever is happening or comes your way and nothing will crush you. You know yourself better than anyone, you know what you’re capable of. Others don’t. Be strong.

Say “No” to “No”s.

 

-Shay

Eight Year Old Me’s Writing Journal!

I recently found an orange notebook, hidden within the pig sty that is my room, entitled (my full name)’s Writing Journal. At first I was curious and excited, since I had completely forgotten about writing in it and what I had written in it. And now, having read it, I feel very nostalgic but also a little amused so I thought I’d share eight year old Shay’s thoughts with you.

(Everything I write in italics is exactly how I wrote it when I was eight. I can say, with confidence, I have improved in writing since then.)

 

The Shooting Star

On a dark dark night with the moonlight shining so bright like dimonds twinkleing and also the stars. One day a girl called Henna went outside because she couldn’t go to sleep. “Wow”, she had just saw something amazing.

“It’s a shooting star.” she said. Woosh she zoomed towards her house and told everyone but they didn’t belive her so she went outside. Suddenly she saw the shooting star fall on the floor. She went to pick it up. 

 

And that’s it. I didn’t write anymore. I clearly thought the story out.

 

What Animal I Would Rather Be

I would rather be cat because you can walk around by yourself but dogs you have to walk with your owner and dogs have to be wet when they bath but cats don’t have to be wet when you bath.

I also wrote another reason why being a cat would be better but very badly attempted to cross out:

I would also want to be a cat because you won’t look scary but dogs look very scary sometimes.

 

Snow

Snow makes me feel delighted becaus you can make snowmen and snowangles. Snow sometimes makes me feel annoyed Because of this my feet and fingers hurt. alot.

 

Bunnyland

I would go to bunny land, which I made up on a peice of paper, because I made it up and when I drew it it looked so colourful and magical I just wanted to go into it. I also want to go there because I love bunnies and sometimes I dream of being in bunnyland. There are shops filled with toys and treats including glorious fruit and veg. There are even competitions and the prizes is money. My adventure in bunnyland would be trying all the competitions. But if I get lost it would be a big adventure.

 

What I Would Do If I Saw An Alien

If I saw an alien in the school playground, I would ask him alot of questions about him and his planet then take photos and put it on the news paper and write what he said to me. 

 

Apparently, I was a corrupt child.

 

Where I’d Rather Live

I would rather live in the sea because there are so many animals and mermaids with water fairies I also want to live in the sea because I love to swim. And once I went on a boat with a hole under it so I could see loads of sea creatures.

 

If you’re wondering, I was talking about a glass-bottom boat not an actual boat with a hole.

 

When I Grow Up

When I grow up I would like to be an Author and an Illistrater because I love to write books about me and my favorite things. I love to draw especially people and animals because they are hard to draw and it’s challenging.

 

If I Was On A Deserted Island 

I would bring food, water and my DSi.

Food will make me full of energy.

Water will keep me cool and not hot.

A game won’t make me bored.

So that is why I would take my 3 items.

If I did not have these items I would starve and be very thirsty and I will even get ill.

 

Seems legit.

 

If I Was A Pirate

If I was a pirate the best thing would be is to find treasure and be rich because I could spend it on anything.

The worste thing would be is that other pirates would bomb and shoot at us and we can get hurt.

I wouldn’t like to be a pirate because it is dangerous even if there is treasure someone could die or get hurt and you may sink while sharks attack. 

 

So those are most of the ramblings I made in my journal. The rest of the journal is just an accumulation of my thoughts and feelings on family and friends and also people’s phone numbers. There’s also drawings with captions underneath or arrows leading off them saying ‘this is bad’ or ‘this is ugly’. Self confidence issues since day one!

 

Did you write in a journal when you were younger?

 

-Shay